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If you harbour ambitions about becoming the next Coleen, here's what a real footballer's wife should expect
Have you ever wondered what it takes to become a member of the prestigious Wives and Girlfriends' (WAG) club?
Well wonder no more. From orange tan to massive shades we give you the must-have guide to becoming the nation's next WAG queen.
Appearance
- Being seen without make-up is a cardinal sin – even when popping out for a pint of milk
- Hair extensions and fake tans are a must
- Juicy Couture tracksuits and Gucci sunglasses are also in
- Bling – you must have at least £10,000 worth of jewellery, including a rock –sized engagement ring
- You must be seen at all times with shopping bags from London's leading designer boutiques
- A mobile phone permanently attached to your ear
Occupation
- Professional Shopper
- Model
- Girl-band member
Special skills
- Shopping until you drop (obviously)
- A an ability to look and sound knowledgeable about the beautiful game
- Being able to smile for the cameras at any time of the day
- Linguistic skills in case your man is transferred to Madrid
Other key requirements
- A mock Tudor mansion, complete with widescreen televisions in all rooms and remote controlled lighting
- Top of the range Mercedes four wheel drive
- A dominant mother-in-law (preferably one able to crack walnuts with her teeth)
- The most expensive and over-the-top wedding, with a budget greater than the GNP for most third-world countries
- .....the obligatory Essex lilt
